Monday, October 27, 2008

EX c

isn't it crazy how the things that bring you so much happiness are also the things that have great potential to hurt you?

you don't regret the things you do,
you regret the things you don't do

BUT my ankle's about to break off
BUT it's my last freakin season
BUT what if i serrriously hurt myself
BUT there are only 2 races left, suck it up
BUT i can't do well in them anyways
BUT at least i'd have tried
BUT BUT BUT BUT ....... :(

no arcadia, then better at finals?
but how can i run var at finals if i don't run arcadia to prove my time
and if i DO run arcadia, is that gonna just mess me up and make me NOT ABLE to run finals AT ALL? *irony*
so i if i don't run arcadia, and run jv at finals, we need to win first. and if i want to run in cif i'll need to train my ass off from there. but who says i'll even be able to run, period?

"calm down jessie, it's just a freakin sport. it's just running"
ha ha haha hahaa ahaha ha ha hahaa. haha. ahah. hahaha. lol. LOL. haha. Sure. whatever.

sorry if i look like a pussy when i cry, but most of the time it's not because "oh lord, i'm so emotional because i fucked up at mt sac la la la and i feel like such a faiiiiilure boo" (yeah, there's some of that too.. or a lot of it actually) but most of the time it's simply because it hurts a lot. a lot. a lot. and i want to saw off the bottom half of my right leg and throw it out the window. yeup :D

can't live with it, can't live without it.

Monday, October 20, 2008

ay yi yi!

hi hi hi!
I should be doing college stuff huh? TEHE
what the fuck is an SSR? can someone explain?
I did my USC part 1 via mail but they want it online too, what? O_o
Maybe i should work on my personal statementizzles? naaaht.
this is so confusing.
if i KNEW what to do, i'd do it
... or would i?!?! >_<

some things going on this weekizzleeee:
best day of my life #698 awaits tomorrow! kevin, how about we smile the next time we see each other? like this :D
showcase this wed! come watch me and ian and vince!
oxford vball spirit game wed! HAHAH sweet.
Oct. SAT scores out on thurs! dun dun DUNNN.....
Mt. SAC on friday! not running :'( haha oh well just let me die then
FEARy tales on friday! not going :'( but best of luck to 2010!
FALL FESTIVAL carnival on sat! $1million?! gaha let's dO it.

if anyone cares (no one does),
>I will start my mcrunning on mcsunds,
doctor said 3 weeks but jessie said hells no >:O
I'm not even depressed about my situation anymore,
just really fucking angry.
and i guess i'll just channel this anger into training hardcore
in time for Arcadia/league finals
I really want to just cry when i think about this season
hopefully i can turn it around.

happy birthday veronica
you're kind of really special :D

k that's pretty much it
maybe i'll study for civics
or maybe i'll just roll around and take more pictures of mahself
or maybe i'll.... just roll around and take more pictu--DAMMIT!


Friday, October 17, 2008


"You may not be her first, her last, or her only. She loved before she may love again. But if she loves you now, what else matters? She's not perfect - you aren't either, and the two of you may never be perfect together but if she can make you laugh, cause you to think twice, and admit to being human and making mistakes, hold onto her and give her the most you can. She may not be thinking about you every second of the day, but she will give you a part of her that she knows you can break - her heart. So don't hurt her, don't change her, don't analyze and don't expect more than she can give. Smile when she makes you happy, let her know when she makes you mad, and miss her when she's not there."

dang bobmarley. you tell 'em. 0_0